Carson Daly downloaded Snapchat for this surprising parenting reason

Carson Daly says he started using Snapchat to stay in touch with his 13‑year‑old daughter, joining many parents who turn to the platform to bridge communication gaps with teens. Experts note that such digital interactions can complement in‑person connections and cite recent data on teens’ heavy online use.

Carson Daly is using an unconventional tool for parenting help: Snapchat.

During a May 18 appearance on “Today with Jenna and Sheinelle,” Daly joked about the struggles of modern parenting.

“I have a 13-year-old, Etta, who is doing great, who I never speak with,” Daly said to laughter. “Do you speak 13-year-old? ‘Cause I don’t.”

Daly, an anchor for TODAY and the current host of NBC’s “The Voice,” shared that he downloaded Snapchat six months ago as a way to connect with his daughter.

“I have literally communicated with my daughter, in particular, more via Snapchat than I have in real life,” he said.

Daly’s family isn’t alone in having these conversations. Child development and digital literacy experts say families across the country are navigating the same challenges as parents look to connect with their teens in an increasingly online world.

“We want to communicate with them, and they have very different styles of communication,” says Siggie Cohen, a child development specialist and parenting coach who is the author of the forthcoming book “YOU ARE THE PARENT.” “It breaks down some barriers; it makes children feel more comfortable where they are.”

Daly, 52, went on to explain that these brief interactions are a way to stay in touch with Etta, the second oldest of his four kids. He also shares Jackson, 17, London, 11, and Goldie, 6, with wife, Siri.

“I can say, ‘Are you OK?’ And then I’ll put some stupid emoji. And she’ll write back, like, ‘LOL,’ and all these little things are flying all over the screen,” Daly says.

“As silly as it is, I am connected a little bit,” he continued.

Cohen says she often encourages parents who are struggling to connect with their teenagers to slip a note under their door or text them, and says using Snapchat is no different. These small digital interactions can be a healthy part of a well-rounded relationship that also includes in-person activities, according to Cohen.

She says Daly was “allowing his daughter to be herself in her comfort zone” while still “taking a step towards her.”

“I know that a lot of people are alarmed (that) this is a sign of the times,” Cohen says. “This is just another object that we basically have that allows us to feel comfortable with each other and meet each other on a level that makes us connect.”

Young people’s lives are increasingly online. Parents are trying to catch up.

Daly says he’s taking a page from the business idea to “meet kids where they are,” and for most teens, that place is online.

Nearly half of teens say they’re online constantly, according to 2024 data from the Pew Research Center, and 72% of teens say they sometimes or frequently check their notifications as soon as they wake up.

Kaitlyn Regehr, author of “Smartphone Nation,” says the viral moment also speaks to the grip social media has on teens.

“It highlights how fully Big Tech has inserted itself into family relationships, to the point where communication between a parent and child is now being mediated through Snapchat,” Regehr says.

Teens’ views of social media’s impact have trended increasingly negative, but roughly 74% of teens also say social media helps them form connections and feel connected to their friends’ lives, according to Pew Research.  

Among TikTok, Instagram and Snapchat users, Pew Research found Snapchat users were the most likely to say keeping up with friends and family was a major reason they use the platform. About three in 10 teens say they post or message on Snapchat daily.

Regehr says parents should also talk with their kids about algorithms and the potential for misuse by bad actors on social media, citing concerns over online safety.

“We can help teens become more critical and empowered over the technology they use,” Regehr says.

How parents can connect with their teens

Cohen says the teenage years are typically when young people begin creating distance from their parents and other adults in their lives as they figure out who they are in relation to their peers.

That shift can be scary for parents who feel their teens pull away. According to Cohen, that fear can sometimes lead to judgment rooted in misunderstanding.

She says to “be curious” and “inquisitive, not accusative.”

“We want to understand that our teens are changing right in front of our eyes, they’re learning and discovering the world that they are part of, not necessarily just our world,” Cohen says. “In order for us to connect to them, we want to learn about their world, not judge it.”